Forgetting to Hold On, You Learned to Let Go Instead
by WitchJuliana
Summary: There was always something wrong between the two of them. A dynamic that should have been balanced, but wasn't quite right. It's when he looks down at his hands, guilty as charged, that he finds himself at a loss as to what to do next. The only thing left to do is make things right. To fix the balance between them, and to give Jasper what he always deserved.


**A/N: More character will show up in the second chapter, heck ye. Also, while Jaspvid is not the main point of this fic, if you're so inclined to still read it as such, I guess you can. Just keep in mind that it won't end well in that aspect.**

**Special thanks to FiniteXS and AfterReign for sitting through my fic and betaing it despite having no fucking clue what was going on. They got fics on here too, but I think for their most recent fics, you can also find them on AO3. They use the same usernames there too!**

* * *

"Do you remember?" A small voice speaks up from the black void around him. He looks around, but there's nothing to pin the voice down to a something. "...It's okay if you don't."

He wants to say something, but his tongue is dry and heavy, and he finds it difficult to make sounds.

"I think it's better that way. Even if it's a little scary."

The voice continues on, and a bright light starts to eat the dark away.

"Don't worry though, I'll stay by your side. Until you remember."

He looks around for the voice once more, but it refuses to show itself. The light takes over his vision, and the last words he hears are:

"Wait for me during the full moon."

And he opens his eyes.

* * *

David is known for many things. One of those things, however, is NOT waking up in the middle of the night from a dream he can't remember. He shakes his head and tries to remember, but all that he can recall is a familiar voice, telling him to wait for him during the full moon and...

"Jasper?"

He looks across from where he lays in his little cot to where his best friend and tent neighbor should be, but the brunette is nowhere to be found. He gets up and his head starts to hurt more and more.

Jeez, what did they do today? He feels bandages around his head, recalls something falling on him and-

Oh. Huh. Getting hit in the head must have knocked him unconscious. Except, he doesn't quite remember what it was that knocked him out.

Whatever? Maybe. He probably needs to get checked out by a doctor. Or maybe he already has? Gosh, memory loss sure does suck.

Wait, wasn't he supposed to be looking for Jasper? He gets up and hops off his cot, sticking his head out of their shared tent to see the inky blackness that comes with night, and the moon shining down so brightly from the sky.

It's round, full like a cheese wheel in the sky, and something pings in his memory.

"_Wait for me during the full moon_."

"Jasper?" He whispers out the boy's name, but no resounding answer comes back to him. That voice from his dreams- that had to be Jasper. But why? Jasper never wanders around at night by himself - he always wakes up David if he needs to use the bathroom at night, just so he doesn't get caught by QM's wanderings around camp.

There was only one thing to do.

David swallows hard before going off into the night looking for his best friend.

_Wait for me during the full moon_.

But where?

He searches around the camp, looking through the places they normally frequent, where Jasper hides when he doesn't want to be bothered by the other campers. Places only the two of them are privy to.

But Jasper is nowhere to be found. David could be searching under every rock and pebble, but his best friend would simply not be there.

"Aw, hooey." He kicks at the ground, staring up into the sky with a frown. "This really isn't the time or place for hide-or-seek, Jasp." A cloud floats by the moon, blocking off some of the much needed light that David needs for his search.

"Yeah, you're right."

"Ahh!" David jumps back and away from Jasper, who somehow managed to sneak up on him. In response, Jasper jumps away from David, shock clear on his face as he holds up his hands.

"Woah, homeslice! Take it easy, it's just me, Jasper!"

"Jasper!" David breathes a sigh of relief before immediately putting his hands on his hips and frowning. "What are you doing?! It's the middle of the night, and we could get in trouble with-"

"Yeah, hold on." Jasper grabs his hand and pulls him off to the side. It's then that he notices the dark soot on his friend's arms and legs.

"...Um, Jasp?" He points at the soot, making Jasper freeze. "What uh, what were you doing...?"

"Um. I was..." Jasper turns to look at David, searching his eyes for something, only to have Jasper's shoulders slump with a sort of realization that David can't understand. "I was just, I guess you can say that I was helping clean the campfire ashes from earlier. You know, I just got uh... nervous? And worried. That there were some embers leftover from earlier!"

"Oh! Of course." He nods in agreement. Jasper has, and always will be, the best camper, even if he sort of hates camp now. Technically speaking, Jasper is still the best out of all of them when it comes to trailblazing, starting campfires, identifying animals, and so on! Hate doesn't get rid of his skills that easily. David is so proud of his best friend.

He should tell Jasper that more often.

Jasper dusts himself off before taking David's hand again and tugging him off into the forest. David goes along with it for a while before he realizes that it is, in fact, still night out. He comes to a stop, jerking Jasper back a bit as the older boy turns to look at him.

"...Shouldn't we be getting back to the tents?" If Jasper was annoyed with David's constant stopping and concern, he didn't show it. If anything, his eyes softened from their usual hardened scowl before shrugging.

"Don't feel like it."

"Wha- Jasper! It's late out. We need to sleep to prepare for tomorrow's activities."

"Or... We can have our own late night adventure?" Jasper gestures out towards the woods, cutting off David's horrified sputtering quickly. "It'll only be for tonight, and besides! You used to sneak out all the time."

"But that was when I was a rotten apple. Now I'm better! A good camper. And everyone's friend!"

He doesn't acknowledge how that last statement rang hollow even in his ears.

Jasper rubs his arm, looking away with a grimace before sighing. He looks back to David, and a small smile graces his features as he tugs on David's hand yet again.

"Well, as your best friend, I just want to, you know, show you something mad radical."

"Can't it wait until morning?" David yawns, hoping that Jasper could take the hint. He usually does. Jasper is dependable like that. But the boy just shakes his head, tugging him further into the woods.

"It can't." He points up at the stars and his smile turns into a grin. "The stars don't show up during the daytime."

"Wait, stars?!" David's eyes sparkle with anticipation as he picks up his pace. "Didn't we already do some stargazing last week though?"

"The stars change position every night, Davey. And besides," Jasper speeds up, making Davey jog just to keep pace with him, "they've never taken us to this clearing before. It's just up this hill, and it's got the best view of the stars I've ever seen!"

It's been a while since he's seen Jasper this excited about anything. He grins and follows his best friend's lead. The trek up the hill is filled with giggled whispers as the pair talk about anything but camp.

What movies they want to watch once summer is over.

Their favorite bands.

The schools they're going to.

If they're going to come back to camp.

(David is a hard yes, while Jasper gives a hard no. He pretends not to be sad and disappointed, but Jasper takes notice anyways. Jasper always notices.)

They make it to the top of the hill with no effort, and it's then that he realizes how right Jasper was.

One of the many things that makes camping so wonderful is the stars. He's seen star maps once or twice before, when his classmates would pull out a book and spread it out on a desk, nudging him out of the way so that they can all see it better without him there. But out here, no one can push him away if he wants to see the stars too.

And the stars look so much more beautiful in real life than in books.

Jasper sits down and pats the space next to him.

Another perk of camping.

Someone actually wants him around.

He sits down next to the brunette, and they both crane their heads up to count the millions of stars decorating the sky.

"Do you remember any of the constellations?"

"Not really, no."

"That's okay. We can just make up our own."

"Don't we do that anyways?"

"Yeah."

They both laugh, and David forgets about getting caught or being in trouble. Instead, he points up at the sky and starts tracing shapes with Jasper watching. He connects the stars, and a dog jumps out at them, happily slobbering and barking in the sky while Jasper traces out a cat that playfully bats at the dog.

They create trees and butterflies, spaceships and cruise ships, books with stories and boxes full of treasures. They come up with little tales for each shape they make, and by the time the two of them realize they've made a hundred and one stories, a little streak crosses the sky above them.

"Wow!" David points to where the comet had disappeared to. "A shooting star!" He closes his eyes and makes a wish, clasping his hands together as he wishes and wishes and wishes.

When he opens his eyes, he sees Jasper staring up at the sky, eyes open and palms laid flat on the grass.

"Jasp?" The older boy turns to him slightly, gaze distant as he hums a response. "Did you make a wish?"

For a while, Jasper simply stares.

And then he smiles.

"Yeah." There's a bittersweet note to his tone when he turns back to look at the sky. "I don't think it'll come true, though."

"That's not true! All wishes made on a shooting star come true. That's what I learned from camp!"

"Aw jeez, Davey." Jasper hides his snickers behind a hand before standing up. "Even you gotta know that some of the stuff they say is bogus crud."

"Well, if you don't believe in that shooting star, then your wish will never come true for sure." He stands up next to Jasper, hands on his hips as he grins with triumph. Surely that will get Jasper to admit that shooting stars grant wishes! Jasper just shakes his head, getting up to start walking down the hill.

"Uh huh, sure thing, homeslice."

"Come on, Jasper!" He catches up to the brunette, resting a hand on his shoulder. "Don't you want your wish to come true?"

Jasper pauses for a moment, making David stumble forward. Blue eyes go back to staring at the sky above them, stars winking and blinking like they're holding a secret that neither of the boys are aware of. For a moment, a pang of fear settles in the pit of David's stomach, and he squeezes Jasper's shoulder as if just the slightest movement could blow the boy away from him.

A breeze ruffles their hair as they stand under the light of the moon, and a soft sigh blends in with the wind.

"Davey," his name is uttered in a voice so low that it could be mistaken as a whisper, "you don't know how badly I want my wish to come true."

David swallows. It feels as though he has just stumbled onto something he really didn't want to discover. But he shakes it off, pretending that Jasper's words didn't have a hint of foreboding that he didn't want to acknowledge. Instead, he pats the other with a comforting force instead, smiles for the both of them as he keeps them grounded.

"Then it's better if you don't tell me, right?"

Muted blue meets lively green, and Jasper smiles back with a softness so gentle it settles whatever emotion David was feeling back into the ground.

"Yeah."

* * *

Jasper doesn't lead them both back to camp. Instead, he leads them deeper into the woods.

"We're going to have an adventure, just the two of us." His grin was enough to soothe whatever worries David had. "It'll be totally tubular, just you wait!"

"...Okay!" David rubs his hands together, trying to keep his nervous energy to himself. All he had to do was trust Jasper, right? Jasper has never steered him wrong before. Not even on accident. Only a real square would doubt Jasper's words.

Only a real square would.

Only...

"Davey?" Jasper snaps him out of his thoughts, a steadying hand on his shoulder. "You okay?"

"Uh, yeah!" He grins to reassure his best friend, but Jasper only looks more worried. "I'm fine, really. Just thinking."

"Well, don't let your thoughts get heavy, duderino." Jasper taps the top of his head before turning back to lead them on. "It'll only you weigh you down in a gnarly way."

"Only you could say smart things in a weird way."

"What's wrong with the way I talk?"

"Nobody says 'gnarly' anymore."

"Dang, Davey! I haven't heard you complain about my radical lingo in a while."

"Maybe it's because you're using it way more than you usually do."

"Maybe it's because you haven't really noticed until now." Jasper turns to grin, and David returns the grin with full force. "Maybe you got used to it, and you're only realizing it now."

"Maybe you're just being really weird!"

"I'm not being weird!"

"Who has midnight adventures in the middle of the woods?"

"You used to do it all the time!"

"...So you WERE awake."

Jasper laughs with his entire gut, and the sound of his laughter makes David laugh along with just as much ease. When they both manage to calm down, they come to a stop near a riverbed. Flashes of a memory come to mind, but he pushes them away when Jasper kneels down besides it, running his hands through the cool water as he idly hums. He kneels down next to Jasper, watching as the water runs between Jasper's fingers.

The river looks different in the night, he finds.

It sparkles almost, under the shine of the moon. He tilts his head to the side, watching as small fish swim with the river's current, the scales reflecting the light as the fish ignore the fingers dipping and swishing the water. The stars themselves have reflections in the river, and an air of serenity and peace easily overcomes the pair as they breathe in the crisp night air. Crickets sing their melodies as David joins in dipping his hand into the cold water, relishing how the flow of the water pushes against his fingers. The leaves above them rustle gently, and neither of them speak as owls and frogs speak to each other, not wanting to interrupt nature's own conversations.

David lowers his hand as far as his arm can go, and his fingertips brush against the bottom of the river. He swishes his arm back and forth, feeling the gritty dirt get under his fingernails as he drags it along the bottom. With a careful maneuver, he dips his fingers in deep enough that he manages to pull out fingertips worth of river sand. Jasper turns his attention to David as the ginger lets the wet sand slowly drip off his fingers and back into the river, creating little dusty storms of sand that the fish swim through. They both giggle as David cleans his fingers, watching as fish take curious nibbles of his fingers before swimming away with disinterest.

With quiet purpose, Jasper begins to pull off his socks and shoes, David following in suit. Nothing beats soaking feet into bodies of water, after all. They both sigh as they lean back on their hands, feet kicking idly in the river's water as they both stare out into the scenery.

"...It's totally different when there's nobody else here, huh?" David breaks the peace for a moment, his voice mingling in easily with the croaks of the frogs and the hoots of the owls.

"Mhm."

"A lot more quiet. A lot more peaceful."

"A lot more... free." Jasper kicks a foot up from the river, letting the water drip down back into the river. "Like we can do anything we want. No one to tell us what to do. No one to tell us we gotta do things a certain way, or follow some dumb bogus rule that makes no sense."

"Rules are made for a reason, Jasp." Even though the words leave his lips, David, for once, doesn't completely push them so seriously. He can tell from the smirk on Jasper's face that he doesn't buy David's act either. "They're supposed to keep up safe, or something."

"Coming from the kid who used to break them all the time."

"I didn't know any better!"

"Or maybe you just didn't care?"

"That too." David hums thoughtfully, before turning to Jasper. "Don't tell anyone about that."

"That you didn't care?" A surprised laugh escapes Jasper. "Dude, everyone knew that!"

"Still." David dips his hand into the water and grins widely. "If you tell anyone, you don't know WHAT I could do to you."

"What? Splash me?"

"Yes!" David brings his hand up, pulling water up alongside it to splash the brunette next to him. Jasper brings his arms up with a laugh, trying to shield himself from David's onslaught.

"Hey! No fair!"

It doesn't take long before both of the boys continue the splash fight, their laughter breaking through the quiet of the woods. Once the two of them are thoroughly soaked, they both lay back on the grass, feet still soaking in the river as they pant and laugh. As the water from their clothes sinks into the grass beneath them, David finds himself back in his thoughts. Jasper's humming fills the silence between them as he thinks.

He thinks, why haven't they done this before? Going out at night just to have fun and see Jasper actually smile again instead of frowning and grumping around camp. Had he known this was all it took to see his friend smile like he did when they first joined, he would have let Jasper do whatever he wanted much sooner.

Then he thinks, why _hasn't_ he done this sooner? They could have had fun like this even before Jasper became closed off and annoyed at the world. But then again, wasn't that when he was annoyed and closed off to the world? Would his old self have liked to have hung out with Jasper like this?

A small part of him wants to believe that he would have.

Even back then, Jasper wanted to be a friend to him.

He was the only one who seemed capable of talking to him, at least.

Maybe it had to do with being stuck with David in their shared tent.

Did Jasper always want to be his friend?

When did they start to become friends anyways?

His thoughts become heavy, and he sinks lower into the grass.

What did he do to deserve Jasper as a friend?

Nothing good, to be honest.

All he ever did was get mad and call Jasper mean names just for trying to be nice to him.

"Davey?"

In fact, they only recently became best friends, huh?

He probably pushed Jasper into it.

Probably forced him to be his best friend.

"Davey."

What he wouldn't give to go back in time and slap himself for being such a mean jerk.

"Davey!"

A steady hand grabs and shakes his shoulder. He snaps out of his thoughts, his eyesight strangely blurry as he looks over at blue eyes filled with worry. A small concerned smile joins those familiar blues on Jasper's face, and his hand moves up to wipe something off of David's face.

"Hey, man." His voice is softer than the breeze ruffling their hair as Jasper pushes himself up to better look at David. "What did I say about letting your thoughts get heavy?"

He doesn't have an answer for that.

Instead, he rubs at his face roughly before sitting up abruptly.

"Jasper."

"Yeah?" The grass rustles beneath him as Jasper sits up as well.

"Are we... are we friends?"

Stunned silence.

Then a soft laugh.

"Of course we are."

"But why?"

"...Why?"

"Why?" David turns to look at Jasper, and his words sounding as miserable as the thoughts bouncing around in his brain. "Why are you friends with me?"

"...Davey?"

"I was mean to you!" David buries his face in his hands, refusing to look up at those gentle blues that always seem to follow him no matter where he looks. "I was mean to you and Darla and Gregg and everyone else at camp! No one else liked me, except you. You were different. You didn't need to be my friend. You didn't need to put up with all my dang hooey!"

"...Davey." Gentle hands pulls his own away from his face. Still, he doesn't meet Jasper's eyes. "I wanted to be your friend."

"But _why_?"

"Because." Jasper squeezes his hands, and he doesn't have to look up to know that he's smiling. "I can't just let a fellow camper be a loner when he's surrounded by all sorts of people. And besides, I know what it's like to be lonely."

"You? Lonely?"

"You'd be surprised." He finally looks up, and there's a sad little sparkle in Jasper's eyes. "I know lonely like the back of my hand."

David looks away from Jasper's sad eyes and focuses on the ground instead. "I was still mean to you and everyone."

"Yeah, I'm not gonna lie, you did go postal for no reason sometimes, and it sucked a lot." David's shoulders slump. "But I didn't want to give up on you."

"...Huh?"

"I didn't want to give up on you." Jasper lets go of his hands and shrugs, looking away and into the river as he speaks. "We share the same tent. I saw parts of you that you thought you could hide. I know you cried at night in your sleep. I know you were sad. And even though you were mean to me, you weren't actually THAT mean. You just used mean words and acted all tough. But you never did anything to hurt me or anyone else." Jasper scratches at his face nervously, before looking back at David. "I've met meaner, and you've never stooped to their level. And besides," his grin returns, and he offers his hand to David, "would a mean person try and save me from falling from a cliff? Or rescue me from a cave of bears?"

He looks to Jasper and then to his hand, before taking it slowly. Jasper pulls him into a tight hug, and he sinks into his hold, resting his cheek on the older boy's shoulder.

"...I'm still sorry."

"It's okay. I forgive you. I've forgiven you a long time ago."

"...Thanks."

They sink into a comfortable silence, clinging to one another while the crickets sing their lullabies into the night.

David thinks back to his wish and wonders what Jasper could have wished for.

"...Hey, Jasp?"

"Hm?"

"Um... Thanks. For being my friend."

"...Of course. Thanks for being my friend too."

"Will we..." He pulls back from their hug to look Jasper in the eye. "Will we always be friends?"

Jasper blinks once. Twice. And a flash of emotion flickers in his eyes before he settles on a smile that doesn't reach his eyes.

"Always." He squeezes David's arms with a desperate kind of reassurance. "We'll always be best friends, Davey."

* * *

The river leaves them wet and shivering, so the boys get a move on, hoping that walking will warm them up as Jasper leads the way. It's silent as the two of them continue their trek through the woods with Jasper somehow knowing which turn to take no matter which direction they go in.

As they walk, David looks back up at the sky, watching it for any signs of change. Normally, he wouldn't mind watching the sky change hues as time passes, and seeing the sun rise up from its hiding place to bid the world good morning. But tonight, he hopes that the sun stays in hiding, just so he can keep venturing the woods with Jasper. Even if it's only for a little bit longer.

"We're here!" Jasper turns to smile at David as they arrive at a clearing.

The clearing here is different from the one up the hill. Here, there's a few moss-covered logs littering the floor, and the trees almost obscure the sky. It would have been boring to look at if it weren't for Jasper, already picking a log to sit on and waiting for David to join him. He sits down next to his friend and looks around, wondering what little secret Jasper is going to share with him next.

"What are we waiting for?"

"Just give it a sec."

So he does.

A minute or two passes when he spies a glowing light slowly approach them. He looks over at Jasper, seeing the absolute glee on his face as the light turns into two, three, four, and then so many that the forest turns into the sky itself.

In quiet amazement, the two of them watch the forest as small, yellow lights slowly dance their way into the clearing. Fireflies float about the clearing lazily, flitting here and there, tickling their faces and continuing their dance in the sky. David has never seen fireflies since he's come to camp, and it amazes him how brightly they shine together.

"...Wow!"

"Pretty wicked, right?"

"Is this 'wicked' like, a good wicked? Or is this the bad wicked?"

"The good one, you goof!" Jasper punches his arm lightly, and David laughs as he punches back.

"You use 'wicked' both ways, I just wanted to make sure!"

"Sure you did." Jasper rolls his eyes and turns his attention back to the fireflies. "Bet you've never seen these many fireflies before, huh, Davey?"

"I've never really seen fireflies before, to be honest." He scratches his chin in thought, before amending his statement. "Well, not this up close at least. I probably saw them a couple times in the distance. Actually," he turns to face Jasper, a look of realization on his face, "that explains all those weird lights I would see at night."

"Pfft- what did you think those lights were?"

"Eyes." His fingers turn into imaginary claws as he makes a mockingly scary face. "I always thought that something was watching us in the forest at night. Like a monster or Jason from those scary movies."

"Jason-!" Jasper breaks out into a gut wrenching laugh, bending over as he tries to collect his breath. "You thought- a serial killer- in the forest?"

"Haven't you seen the movies? Jason totally kills kids in camps."

"I don't think-" He clears his throat before attempting to speak again. "I don't think he was killing kids at a summer camp, Davey. I thought it was teenagers."

David shrugs with a grin. "Same difference."

"What were you gonna do if it was a real killer?"

"I'd fight him off." David lifts a fist up to the sky, all bravado as a bit of his tough guy act leaks back in. "I'm the toughest guy in camp! Nobody would be killed with me around. I'd protect everyone, and nobody would die a scary death!"

"Haha, even me?"

David leans against Jasper, yawning as the fireflies continue their dance. "Especially you. You're my best friend."

"Hmm..." Jasper leans back against him, his eyes fixated on the fireflies around them. "Tell me how you'd beat him up."

"Umm, I would like. Punch him. Kick him in the nards. Break his dang mask and, I don't know, jump on him. Break some bones. Probably use a sharp stick or something." David yawns again, feeling comfortable against Jasper. "Then I'd tie him up, and he wouldn't hurt anyone anymore."

"Sounds pretty gnarly."

"In a good way?"

"Yeah."

They settle into a comfortable silence, David feeling content enough to want to fall asleep, but he keeps his eyes open stubbornly. If Jasper can stay awake for this long, then so can he. He's almost thankful when Jasper speaks up again, giving him something to focus on that isn't his sleepiness.

"...Don't you think fireflies are pretty lucky?"

"Hm?"

"I think they're pretty lucky."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean." Jasper straightens up, gesturing to the bugs in front of them as he searches for his words. "Look at how bright they are. No matter how lost one bug gets, it can always find its way back home."

"...Okay?"

"It's just." Jasper combs through his hair, smiling awkwardly as he keeps his eyes on the light. "It must be nice knowing that you can always find your way back home."

David sits up straight, his weight off of Jasper as he studies his friend's face. It's tense, like he wants to say something else, but the words are too caught up in his thoughts for him to even let them out. "...Are you scared of getting lost?"

Jasper shakes his head, then nods, before settling on a shrug. "I guess you can say that."

"But you're the camp's best trailblazer! I don't think you could get lost even if you tried."

"I guess you can say that." Jasper's smile is weak, and it leaves David feeling unsatisfied. "But even trailblazers can get lost every once in a while."

"...If you're scared of getting lost, maybe don't go alone?"

"Huh?"

"Don't go alone." David was hesitant at first, but his words pick up as he stands up from their log. "Go with a friend. And even if you get a little lost, you'll have someone there to guide you back." He offers Jasper his hand.

"But what if, what if I have to go alone? What if I go out by myself, and there's no one there to guide me back?"

"Then..." He pauses for a bit, looking at the fireflies all around. For a moment, he wonders if even fireflies can get lonely, if they're afraid of the dark after being so used to being surrounded by other bugs that light up their world. He turns his attention back to Jasper, his hand still held in the air. "Then I'll come find you."

Jasper stares at his hand. "...Promise?"

"Promise!" David grins, hand never faltering once. "I'll be your firefly, and you can follow my light until you're not lost anymore."

"Heh." Jasper takes his hand, letting David pull him up with a smile. "Since when did you get poetic and stuff?"

David shrugs before gesturing to their environment. "I guess staring at bugs really sticks it in your head."

"I guess so." Jasper laughs as he pulls his hand free from David. "You still wanna keep trailblazing with me?"

"Yeah!" He keeps close to Jasper's side, watching as the fireflies drift off to another place to dance. "And I'll make sure we don't get lost."

Jasper's eyes soften as he looks off to their next stop. "Sounds like a plan."

* * *

A night can only last so long. That's what rings in David's mind as he follows Jasper's footsteps, looking up at the moon as it slowly sinks. He doesn't know how many more "stops" Jasper has in mind, but given how the moon looks ready to bid the night a good morning, he doesn't think they'll have that much time left until Jasper's final stop is the camp itself.

He grips his vest tightly and looks forward.

He doesn't want their adventure to end tonight.

This was the most fun he's had with Jasper since... never. Never has there been a time where they were both so openly happy, so honest with each other without the undercurrent of bitterness or anger that seemed to sink into one of them during the daytime.

It is almost regrettable.

They call each other best friends, but why is it only now that they've gotten to really spend time together like this? Why is it when they're the only two around that they're okay with dropping any and all pretenses to just- be themselves?

To be this close and have only one memory between them that they can call good. Is that what being best friends is all about?

He takes back what he thinks before.

It is truly regrettable.

He wants more memories like this. More memories where they're both laughing and smiling. Where they're both sticking by each other's side, supporting each other, and reassuring each other - like real best friends.

He wants more time with Jasper. Before the night ends. Before summer ends.

Before...

An emptiness opens up in his heart as if reminding him that it's there and always has been there. A word is already pinned to that space, and it scares him that he knows what it is.

_Loss_ looms over his head like a threat, but he can't understand where or why that feeling crushes him out of nowhere. All he knows is that it's there now, mocking him with a foreseeable future that only he can't see, and he wants more than anything to bat the feeling away, to replace that emptiness with the warmth he's felt all night with Jasper.

(A warmth he fears won't last through the night.)

He falls to a halt, his shoes scuffing the ground beneath them as he hugs himself. Jasper turns, his eyes almost glowing in the dark as they widen with surprise.

"Davey?" Jasper is by his side in an instant, steadying hand on his shoulder as though David were to collapse at any second. Maybe he will. "Hey dude, are your thoughts heavy again?"

That question again. It's suspicious, really, that Jasper came up with that sentence tonight of all nights. Like he knew that David would be feeling like this somehow. The suspicion doesn't burn him or tear at his insides. It's nothing like he'd expect it to feel. Instead, it weighs him down like a rock that sinks him to the bottom of a lake, and he accepts it as if he's been expecting this feeling to come for a long, long time.

He laughs bitterly before letting his arms drop to the side. "Why are you saying that?"

"What?"

"That my thoughts are heavy. It's like, you know something." He looks to Jasper, but he hopes his eyes don't look as accusatory as his voice feels. "Like you're hiding something."

For a moment, all Jasper can do is swallow. His hand drops from David's shoulder, and the feeling of cold that permeates David's being leaves him wishing that he said nothing.

"...Isn't it weird?" Jasper speaks with a broken laugh, and he turns away from David to look at the moon. "That we're saying all this stuff? Like we're getting it off our chests or something bizarro like that?"

It is weird.

Something about the night just has him tossing and turning his thoughts around in his head, thinking thoughts he's never considered before or even bothered to sit down and conceive. Or maybe, he's always had these thoughts, but never gave them any real recognition until tonight.

There was something about tonight that made it feel as though they were both knocking down walls neither of them realized they had up.

A wall they hadn't known was there to begin with, but only now they've started to knock over.

He wishes they knocked it over sooner.

He finds that he's wishing for a lot of things tonight.

"...I guess. I guess it's more weird that. We've never really talked like this before." David wrings his hands, looking towards the ground as he does so. "It's weird, right? We're supposed to be best friends, but this is the first time we've really..."

He pauses, remembering their talks about their wishes, their feelings, their lives, everything and anything in-between that's only really appeared tonight. He tries to remember what they talked about before in camp, but all he draws up are complaints. Complaints from him about how much he hated camp, complaints about the counselors and other campers. Complaints about Jasper. And then, after that day with the bear and ceremony, their roles switch. He draws up complaints, but they come from Jasper instead. Complaints about how much Jasper hated camp, complaints about Campbell and how the counselors didn't bat an eye at his injuries. But never complaints about David. In the end, they never really actually talked about anything, have they? They've just... talked at each other.

He swallows hard, trying to pick up from where he trailed off. "...This is the first time we've talked about anything, really."

For a minute, even the sounds of the forest quiet down for just the two of them.

And all is breathlessly quiet.

Neither say a word as he watches Jasper's shoes move from beside him to in front of him, their toes just inches apart.

"Do you regret it?"

He looks up and meets Jasper's eyes, the familiar blues hiding everything and nothing at the same time. "...What?"

"Do you regret talking like this?" Jasper combs his fingers through his hair, awkwardly looking away before facing David again. "All this stuff that makes you sad and upset, making your thoughts feel heavy and whack, like you broke a dam and suddenly you can't stop it?" Jasper stuffs his hands in his pockets, and David finds it odd that the moon silhouettes him perfectly. "Do you regret this?"

"I..." David looks to Jasper's eyes to his hands, to the shoes that don't light up- don't light up? He shakes his head to ignore that sense of strangeness that threatens to overtake him and focuses back on Jasper's fidgeting form. "I don't regret talking, I don't think. I want to think that, this is good. That we're doing this. But it's also making me realize things. That I... do have some regrets. That it took so long for us to act like... real friends." A realization strikes him on his feet, and he almost falls forward as his hands stop fidgeting. "Jasper, are we- are we bad friends?"

A look of pain flashes over Jasper's face, and he wishes he could take back his words, but Jasper just takes a deep breath through his nose, before letting it out slowly, and that broken laugh returns.

"We... we kinda are, huh?"

"I don't want to be bad friends." His response comes out before he can even think about it. David gulps, biting his lip before standing firm. "I don't want that. I liked tonight. I liked trailblazing with you. And I liked spending time with you and. I liked laughing and smiling and having fun with you. And." He takes a step forward, toes just a single inch apart, and he's resting a hand on Jasper's shoulder, steady, firm, just like how Jasper has been for him tonight. "I liked that you were happy and having fun too."

Jasper says nothing, instead looking away with a lip trembling. David continues, if only to keep the silence from silencing him too.

"I want to be a good friend to you, Jasp. I don't want to be bad friends anymore."

Jasper's hand reaches up to David's, and he holds it tight. They both stand there, each tethering the other to common ground as they find their feet beneath them.

"I want to be a good friend to you too, Davey."

"Okay." David squeezes Jasper's shoulder gently, and he grins through the wetness on his cheeks. "Okay, let's try again."

"Yeah." Jasper wraps an arm around David's shoulders and pulls him forward into a quick hug, before pulling apart and taking the lead once more, their feet moving together as he rubs his own tears away. "We'll be better friends to each other this time."

"I think, after tonight, we already are." David doesn't care where Jasper leads them, as long as he gets to see Jasper smile again. He moves his hand to Jasper's other shoulder, and the two walk with their arms around each other, close enough that they warm each other's sides in the cold night. "Or at least, we're on the right track?"

"I think so." David matches his footsteps with Jasper's, the trees parting to give them a path that's all their own. The crunch of fallen leaves fills the silence up, their arms never moving once as the moon continues to light their way. For a moment, he thinks he's managed to get rid of all his heavy thoughts, but one little feeling keeps nudging at him, and he doesn't understand why it bothers him, but Jasper is here with him now, so it only makes sense, right?

They're better friends now.

Or at least.

They're working on it.

He opens his mouth before he can regret it, and he asks his question.

"Hey, Jasp?"

"Yeah?"

"Can we keep doing this?"

"Doing what?"

"This. Midnight adventures, finding places to visit and relax in. Just talking by ourselves." He feels Jasper squeeze him tighter, so he returns the gesture as comfort. "We can keep doing this, right?"

"...I'd like that." Jasper doesn't look at him as he speaks, instead keeping his gaze forward as they walk. David smiles, a bounce to his step that fails to match Jasper's heavier ones as they continue on.

"Then let's do it! It'll be so much fun!"

"Yeah. Hey, Davey?"

"Hm?"

"I just. I wanna say this before the night ends." They come to a stop, Jasper taking all of David's attention on the spot. Jasper's eyes flick from one part of his face to another, his nervousness evident in his eyes before he clears his throat. His arm drops from David's shoulders. "I really, really think you're off the heezy."

"Aw, jeez, Jasp." David laughs and tries to squeeze him close, but Jasper keeps still. "I think you're pretty cool too!"

Jasper smiles, but it's sad and nothing at all like David's. It gives him a moment of pause, before he notices where they've come to a stop.

Lake Lilac.

* * *

His arm drops from Jasper's shoulders, a spike of panic already striking through him.

"Oh." If they were already here at Lake Lilac, then that meant that Camp Campbell was just behind them. "...I guess we're calling it a night, then?"

"No." Jasper looks around, before spotting a rowboat moored to the dock. He gestures David to follow him. "We've got one more place to be."

"Oh! Okay." His smile returns to his face as he follows after Jasper, climbing into the boat only to startle quickly as a third figure catches his eye. "Wwwwwho are you?!"

The third figure blinks at him owlishly before turning to Jasper. Jasper himself looks startled, but he recovers faster than David, already pulling the other boy down to sit between him and the third figure. "Um, what's your name?"

The third figure shrugs, before pulling the oars closer to them. "'m name's Chuckie."

Chuckie.

The name rings familiar to David, somehow.

Jasper continues on however, taking an oar from Chuckie with a kind smile. "It's probably easier if I help."

Chuckie shrugs again as he starts to row in tandem with Jasper. "I don't mind, really. It's just nice to have company for once."

"I know what you mean." Jasper grunts with effort as they row through the lake. David looks between Jasper and Chuckie, confusion clear on his face as the two other boys continued to row.

"Wait, do you guys know each other?" Chuckie and Jasper exchange a look, before looking at David.

"To be honest, not really?" Jasper gives him an awkward smile as he shrugs. "But we kinda share a wavelength, if that makes sense."

"It really doesn't." David eyes Chuckie, trying to figure out where he's seen this kid before. The other meets David stare, but nothing gives away what this kid knows about them. He spies the familiar yellow camp t-shirt, and he hums thoughtfully. "Are you a new camper? What are you doing out on a boat?"

"Just had a feeling." Chuckie continues to row, head turned back to keep an eye on the approaching island behind them.

David still can't shake off the feeling that he knows this kid somehow and continues to stare. "Have we met before?"

"Sorta." Chuckie doesn't look at him as he and Jasper rows, the brunette looking between him and David with interest. "But it doesn't look like you remember. Don't think too hard on it though. It'll hurt your head."

"This is gonna bother me all night," David grumbles as Jasper laughs, Chuckie giving no notion that he heard David at all. The pair continue to row, the silence strange now that David can't hear the backdrop of crickets that he had grown so used to hearing. It comes as a relief to David when the rowboat hits against the shores of Regular Island, the ginger jumping out almost immediately. Jasper puts the oar down carefully, nodding gratefully to the other child.

"Thanks for the help."

"It's no problem. Not like I have anything else to do." Chuckie gathers the oars together and remains in his seat. "Whatever it is you're planning, I hope it goes well."

"Yeah, me too." Jasper hops out of the boat and joins David's side, waving to the boy as they begin to walk away. But before they can get beyond earshot, Chuckie's voice carries over to David like a hesitant waver.

"Hey, David." David pauses, turning to look towards Chuckie as the other boy looks nervous for the first time that night. Before David can ask him what he needs, the other boy speaks up again, a hint of sadness in his eyes. "If you do start to remember, just know that I don't hold what happened to me against you." A faraway look settles in Chuckie's eyes as he continues to speak. "You did the best you could, and I don't blame you for anything."

A memory flashes in his mind, but it's gone too quickly for him to recall anything but the feeling of urgency and panic. He shakes his head and tries to focus on Chuckie's silhouette. "What are you-"

In the second that it takes for David to blink, Chuckie is gone from the boat as though disappearing into thin air. David yells, startled by the other boy's disappearing act. He reaches to grab Jasper, but all his hand meets is air. His head quickly turns this way and that, the sudden fear of Jasper disappearing as well on him becoming too real too quickly. "Jasper?!"

For a moment, all he is met with is silence. His eyes fail to spot the familiar brunette anywhere until-

"Is something wrong?" His feet shift in the direction of his friend's voice, and there Jasper stands, some feet away from him but nevertheless there. A sigh of relief escapes him before he remembers Chuckie's disappearing act. He points over to the boat, but it's gone as well. "Aw, dang." David turns back to Jasper, the other taking the missing boat rather calmly. "Guess Chuckie left with the boat. Bummer."

"B- wh-"

"...Davey?" Jasper's hands are up in a placating manner as David's hands go up to tug at his hair. "You okay there, bromide?"

"How can somehow just row away that quickly?" Frantically, he gestures at where the boat was no more than four minutes ago. "It was right there! And he needed your help to row it across the lake!"

"Actually, it's more like I needed his help." Jasper sheepishly rubs his thin arms. "I'm not that strong, Davey."

"But-" None of it makes sense. He runs his hands through his hair, trying to make sense of Chuckie's weird final words, Chuckie disappearing seemingly into thin air, and the boat following in suit. "It doesn't make any dang sense!"

"Jeez, Davey. I thought you swore off using 'dangs'."

"How are you so calm?!" His voice bounces off the trees on the island, the water from the lake carefully lapping up the edge of the bank as if frightened of disturbing the pair. Jasper jumps, taking a step back from David as the ginger stands with fists clenched at his side. "How can you be so calm when some kid we barely met just disappears and leaves us alone on this island with no way to get back?! How can you be so calm when that just happened?!"

Jasper's eyes linger on David's before looking back to where the boat used to be. He looks back at David with what looks like a million thoughts flashing behind his eyes. But David can't tell what he's thinking. Everything feels muted behind Jasper's blues, and he can't parse any meaning from the wide eyes that just stare at him, no real emotion evident behind them.

Blank.

Like an empty shell.

The water laps at the poor excuse of a beach, if they can even call it that. David feels a familiar bitterness well up inside of him, something he thought he had lost forever ago coming back to haunt him at the worst possible time. He tries to bite it back down, he really does, but as he looks up at the moon descending, how the lapping water reminds him that Jasper still hasn't spoken, how they're both technically trapped on this island with no means of getting back, he can't help but feel that old anger come back, and he wants to blame it on someone, on something-

"I'm sorry." The words snap David out of his fuming, burning green eyes meeting somber blues as Jasper grips his own arm. "I guess I... got too caught up in the moment. Sorry."

And just like that, the anger seeps out of David and melts into regret instead. He shouldn't have yelled. Jasper didn't deserve that. It wasn't even Jasper's fault that they were trapped here. God, what was the point of getting angry anyway? It was like he was turning back into his old self. The same one that used to bitch at Jasper for just being Jasper. His fists unclench as he hunches forward, already dropping his aggressive stance to something more curled up, more small. "...I'm sorry too. I didn't mean to yell like that. It wasn't... rad of me."

Jasper laughs a bit when David uses his lingo, and David smiles sheepishly in return. "I guess we both aren't in the right brainspace right now, huh?"

"Yeah. Maybe it's the lack of sleep."

"Hmm, maybe." Jasper looks up at the sky, noticing the moon's descent as well. "Well, the least we can do is continue on. The counselors will come find you by then."

"You mean, us." David jogs to Jasper's side and continues to follow the older boy's lead. "Pretty sure they'll notice if two campers went missing overnight."

Jasper stumbles for a second, before he catches himself and throws a grin at David. "Yeah! Of course." He looks forward, and David feels that pang of fear return. "Us."

They walk in silence, but it's nothing like the companionable one that David had gotten used to. While Jasper walks calmly, almost at ease, David's skin crawls as he looks around the woods. The trees here on Normal Island feel strange.

Different.

Nothing like the ones at camp. At camp, the trees feel like home, welcoming him in with branches like arms, brushing lightly at his being like a mother's warm touch, and it fills him with a feeling he doesn't normally feel when he's at home.

The trees on Normal Island feel like arms too. But not the nice, welcoming kind. No, as he hugs himself, looking anxiously among the branches shaped like claws meant for grabbing, he fears that if he has a single misstep, the branches will reach out and pull him away from Jasper- to a place where he can't return, somewhere cold and lonely and without him in it.

He walks into Jasper, but the other boy barely acknowledges the crash.

"We're here!" Jasper gestures out to another clearing with a clear view of the sky. It's nothing but grass - no fireflies, no stars, no river cutting through to fill their eyes with wonder and midnight talks. Instead, Jasper lays down, his arms folded on his chest as he stares up at the sky. "Have you ever seen a sunrise while laying down?"

David lays down next to Jasper, staring up at the sky as the deep, dark inky blues slowly let in hints of red and orange. "I don't think that's how sunrises work."

"No, I know." Jasper lifts a hand, his palm facing out as a cloud floats by. He clenches his fist, as if to grab it, but cloud continues to float away. "But we don't have to see the sun rise to see a sunrise, y'know?"

"I... guess?"

Jasper doesn't continue his thought, letting them fall into silence again. David forces himself to settle into the present, watching as the night sky melts away with each passing minute, vivid reds and oranges bleeding into the sky as the sun marks the end of another night. Soon, red will turn to orange, and orange to a yellow that illuminates the sky, and what remains of the night turns into a daytime shade of blue that he sees everyday in Jasper's eyes.

A feeling a dread settles in his stomach as he continues to watch the colors begin the transition from one stage to another.

He doesn't want tonight to end.

Not now.

Not when they've talked about so much.

Not when, not when it feels like it'll all-

"Gnarly, right?" Jasper interrupts his train of thought easily, as if he can see David's thoughts as clear as the stars they saw earlier. "How you can watch something happen, but still not see it all happen. Like the moon disappearing or the sun making its entrance."

David just turns his head to look at Jasper, at how the breeze that makes its way through the trees still manages to ruffle his brown locks.

(Except there's no breeze.)

"It's almost radical. And almost sad." Jasper continues on, eyes focused on the changing sky as it moves on. "You can miss something just like that, and you'll know you've missed it, and see what happened after the fact but. You'll never actually really see how that thing happened. Or why. You'll just know that you... missed it."

An impulse in his chest makes him grab Jasper's hand and squeeze it. It takes a long, awful minute before Jasper squeezes back, but their hands remain tight in each other's grasps as they continue to share the remains of a dying, lingering night.

"Whatever happens, Davey, can you promise me something?"

"Anything."

Someone squeezes a hand.

"Even when... even when things change. In a tubular or bogus sorta way. Promise me you'll be okay. Promise me you'll still find a way to be happy."

"That's... a weird promise." Anxiety creeps in with that familiar sense of foreboding, and David finds himself clinging to Jasper's hand. "Why?"

"Just in case."

"In case of what?"

"In case..." Jasper gestures with his free hand, at the sky, at the ground, the trees, to them. "In case, things change."

A whisper of wind drifts by them, and David swears he hears words in that whisper.

"Change...?"

"Yeah, change." Jasper's grip slackens, and David clings just a little tighter.

"Things... change, Davey. They don't last forever." Jasper frowns, biting at his lip as though he has to force the words out, bit by bit. "A lot of things can change if we say or do the wrong things, you know? Like one day, what if one day we think that the other is just super whack, and we go super postal on each other. And if we don't do the right things, or say the right things, things can just. End." Even though they're his own words, Jasper looks crushed by the prospect of it all. "What if we stop being best friends. And it all just, ends, Davey?"

A chill grabs at David's heart.

"That won't happen."

"Huh?"

"I won't let it happen." David sits up, and he stares down at Jasper with an intensity he hopes will make the feelings swirling in his gut go away. An intensity he hopes will make the storm he sees in Jasper's blue eyes, clear as a summer day, go away. "We'll always be friends, Jasp! We can't be good friends to each other if we stop being friends. We said we'd try to be better, together. So we're gonna be together until the end. And that won't change!"

Jasper blinks, before sitting up and looking deep into David's forest greens.

And then he smiles.

Worn, torn, and tired.

All parts of it, incredibly wrong.

"That would be nice."

A bird cries in the distance. It reminds David of a bell chime in the distance, and how it reminded Cinderella that her night was about to end. Something snaps inside him, and all he wants is to take Jasper back to camp right now, before the bell strikes more times than he can count.

He pulls Jasper up, ignoring the older's startled remark as he starts pulling them back through the forest. He has to get them back now.

Fear engulfs his entire being. Something bad is about to happen. He doesn't know what it is, but as the sky changes from red to orange, he realizes that he's running out of time.

He's been running out of time.

The night is already over, and now what's left is nothing but borrowed time.

"Davey?" Jasper calls to him, but David doesn't answer. He just wants to get back to the shore, where maybe Chuckie has come back with the boat, that Chuckie will save the day, that it'll be okay and they'll be in camp and it'll all be okay and nothing will have to change-

Jasper comes to a full stop, jerking David back with him.

"Wait."

David turns back, and Jasper is facing something, somewhere, off the beaten trail.

"...Jasper?"

"I have. One last place to go."

"I don't want to go." He tugs on Jasper's arm, but the brunette doesn't move. "Please? Can we go back? Jasper, please, we have to go back before the counselors know we've been up-"

"Sorry, Davey." Jasper turns back to David, and his smile is nothing happy. He pulls his arm gently from David's hands and steps off the path. "If it helps," he backs up, one step into the shadows that seem to engulf him, "you don't have to follow me."

The second cry rings out when Jasper turns and dashes away from David, making the ginger cry out in turn.

"JASPER!"

He doesn't think.

All he does is feel.

And so he runs after his friend, his best friend, and the shadows feel like they're pulling him, away from Jasper, away from wherever it is that Jasper is heading too.

He thinks the shadows should be pulling Jasper away instead, not him.

By the time he manages to free himself from the shadows, Jasper comes to a halt in front of a cavern of sorts. Words jump out at David, but his mind is too jumbled by a sense of deja vu and anxiety as Jasper turns to face him.

The smile is still on his face, and David wants nothing more than to slap it off.

Instead, he reaches out to grab Jasper.

But Jasper jerks away.

"Davey." He turns to look at the cavern, at the stairs that lead down into its depths. "I said you didn't have to follow me."

"And I said that I wanted to go back." He's panting through his words, but he wants to get them out as quickly as he can. He's running out of time, he knows this. "Why can't you just let us go back?!"

"You can." Someone cries, but it's not the birds. "But I can't."

"Why?!" His vision blurs as he clenches his fists tightly by his side. "Why won't you let us go back?!"

"Davey," his voice is soft, softer than the wind, softer than it's ever been, and it hurts, it hurts David in a way that he's never imagined he could be hurt before, "why do you want to go back so badly?"

"Because." It's hard to explain. A lump forms in his throat, but that's not what keeps him from talking. There's something else, something that keeps wanting to take Jasper back, away from here, away from this cavern and this island and the sky that's too orange and red to be the sky, and it scares him that he can't figure out what it is that he knows, that he can't understand this deja vu that haunts him like a ghost. But then he sees Jasper's eyes, those eyes with the saddest shade of blue to them, cloudier than a clear, blue sky, and he tries. He tries, for Jasper. Because Jasper deserves a good friend. "We're best friends. And best friends stick together, until the end."

He holds out his hand wordlessly, waiting for Jasper to take it.

Jasper's smile doesn't falter.

"I'm sorry, Davey."

And he doesn't take David's hand.

"Please."

David's hand trembles, but he holds it there. For Jasper.

"I can't."

Jasper's cheeks shine with trails that reflects the light of the sun.

"I want us to stay together. We had fun, didn't we?"

It starts to get hot.

"Yeah."

"So, let's keep having fun. Let's keep sneaking off, and having night adventures, and trail blaze, and stargaze, and dance with fireflies, and play in rivers." He gasps through his tears, barely breathing as he chokes out his desperate request. "Please, let's keep being friends."

Jasper looks down at the ground, at his shoes that don't light up, at the grass that looks drier than usual, before looking back up with eyes that shine brighter than the sun.

"The first time this happened, you missed it." Jasper hugs his arms, hunched into himself as he smiles at the ground, kicking at the dead grass all around him. "You missed the whole thing, and then you missed me."

Another cry resounds all around them, and David takes his hand back, only to bury it in his hair as he gasps in pain.

"What-"

"Do you remember?" The words ring familiar, and David squeezes his eyes shut.

"Jasper-"

"It's okay if you don't."

Everything is hot, unbearably so.

"Please, PLEASE-"

"I think it's better that way, even if it's a little scary-"

"STOP!" Jasper's voice comes to a halt, and David wheezes in between desperate gasps as he fights through his sobs. "Just... stop." His hands fall to his sides, something heavy clinging to his wrist.

"...You've grown so much, huh?"

He keeps his eyes shut, because he doesn't want to see. He doesn't want to see.

"Jasper... please."

His voice is different. It doesn't sound like he imagined it to be.

"I guess you remember now, huh?"

A fight. In front of a cavern.

Voices, refusing to understand each other.

An angry declaration. A bitter agreement.

He left him here.

He left Jasper here.

And he missed something.

He missed something very important.

And the next thing he knew.

Jasper wasn't here.

He opens his eyes, and the first thing he sees are the reds and oranges melting down from the sky, like some fucked up painting made of mistakes he didn't want to admit to before. The colors melt and mix into something horrible around them, until all he sees is red and orange and orange and red.

He looks down at Jasper, the boy not having aged a bit, and it strikes David as odd, before the dread washes in.

The boy has not aged at all.

Jasper's smile looks as though it's been through things unspeakable.

His voice comes out raspy as he begs again: "Jasper."

There's smoke behind him.

"Yes?"

"Please."

He doesn't want to remember him like this.

"I'm sorry." Jasper shakes his head and steps back, closer to the smoke, farther away from him. "I'm sorry we fought. I'm sorry I was... a bad friend to you."

"You're sorry? I'm sorry!" He screams, like his lungs are dying and he's running out of time - he was always running out of time, wasn't he? That's why he said all those things, worried about all those things. Why he had so many things to tell Jasper, things he needed to tell him before he reached a "too late" he wasn't even aware of. "I'm sorry I was an awful friend! You were right." His sobs never stopped, it seems. "Campbell _was_ hiding something. He _was_ using me. I know better now. But he's changing! Camp Campbell is changing, and so much is different, and things can be different, so please-" He reaches out again, hand refusing to relent. "Please, just come back with me."

His breath hitches as a bird cries for the fourth, and he wonders if the birds have been crying for them, or with them.

"...do you want to know what my wish was?"

"No." He shakes his head adamantly because he doesn't want to know. He doesn't want to know the truth hiding behind Jasper's words, all the little hints he sneaked behind their conversations that he couldn't bring up while he was dreaming of a past that never happened.

"It doesn't matter. It's not like it's going to come true anyway."

"But it could! It could come true, so please-"

"I wished I was still alive."

David's veins turn to ice, and his breath is knocked out of him just like that.

And Jasper is still smiling, even as he sobs.

"I wish I was alive, Davey." Jasper scrubs at his face, laughing hopelessly as red and orange wraps around him. "I wish I got to grow up, just like you. I wish I got to be tall, and go back to school, and wear different clothes, and groove to new music, and watch new movies, and mature and. I wish I could have lived."

And realization hits.

His hand drops.

"Oh." It's weak, and feeble, like his mind as he slowly acknowledges what he sees before his eyes. "You. You're... dead."

Jasper laughs a laugh so broken that it shouldn't belong to a child.

But Jasper is 25.

Or, at least, he should have been.

God. God, he should have been.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Davey." Jasper's hands fall to his side, and David wants to take his friend away from here. He misses Jasper's smiles. The real, genuine ones he had earlier that night when he was ignorant to everything, when all they did was laugh and talk and bond and exist. "I'm sorry we couldn't be friends until the end."

David opens his mouth just as a realization hits him.

He isn't Cinderella - the same rules don't apply to him. David never had until midnight before it all ended; he had until the first spark ignited the sky with violent shades of red too man-made to be considered natural.

A bird's final cry rings out in the forest.

And Jasper's smile finally falls.

Reds and oranges wrap around him, and it's flames, it's _flames_ that surround the young boy as they pull him away from David.

"JASPER!" He reaches for him again, but the flames burn at his fingertips, and a hollow laugh reaches him instead.

"If it makes you feel better," Jasper's words are soft, barely heard over the roar of the flames that engulf him, "it didn't hurt when it happened."

The watch on David's wrist beeps.

And he wakes up.

* * *

**A/N: In case you were wondering, this was definitely heavily inspired by "Night on the Galactic Railroad" by Kenji Miyazawa. There's also a hint of Persona 3's influence in here, if you squint in all the right ways. Title of this chapter is based off a lyric from a song called, "0621" by Gumi. Even now, I'm still going back to my roots as a Vocaloid fan. Single tear streams down my cheek.**

**Fun fact! This was meant to be completed and published on Oct. 31, like some kinda non-scary ghost story haha. It's December now, so maybe instead I'll just try and focus on... hopefully... completing and publishing that last chapter on Christmas day. #PrayForMeY'all**


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